Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Double Time

Since I didn't post yesterday I made doubly sure to post today.  Yesterday was another stairs day.  I took the day off to be with Dave and get things done around the house while he was sleeping.  As part of "getting stuff done" I went up and down the stairs a grand total of 25 times throughout the day.  I didn't walk but I considered the stairs and house work to be my exercise for the day.  I should probably stop doing that and just consider daily activity as bonus workout minutes on top of my exercise minutes.  Oh well!! Better luck next time. 

Yesterday's stuff though included cross stitch, laundry, dishes, cooking and more general cleaning.  Ya know, the stuff you can do quietly while someone is trying to sleep.  I am totally happy with my cross stitch progress!!  I finished the center design on the stocking ornament I making.  Seeing as how I am a new and therefore extremely slow stitcher I consider that amazing progress.  I only had to take out 6 mistakes and thankfully I caught them shortly after I made them. 

Today I spent the morning with Dave as I will do tomorrow also.  I mean he did take two vacation days to spend time together, the least I could do was take some time off of work.  I did go to work this afternoon for the one client on the books.  She was a regular so I was more than happy to see her today.  On top of being able to help her feel good she was 30 minutes early which let me leave 30 minutes early and she gave me a generous holiday tip.  I have never had a job that allowed me to accept tips but I have to say it is pretty cool. 

Before work Dave and I tried to cut/break the end of a couple wine bottles off because I still haven't figured how to do it for my lamp making yet.  Dave came really close today.  He used the rotary tool to make a deep groove around the bottle and if I hadn't messed it up when I was breaking the bottom off we would have been successful.  We did learn that the hand cutter isn't sufficient enough for wine bottles period.  Also, a metal rotary bit would work 10 times faster than the little stone ones that come with the tool.  Thirdly, even if you don't think the bottom will break off the bottle tap lightly to start and gradually increase pressure.  Do NOT just hit it on a tree without any serious thought to location or how hard.  The bottle definitely broke on the first hit and with a little thought would have broke cleanly all the way around.

Tonight I walked on the treadmill for about 20 minutes, stretched for 5, then did 3 sets of 10 for crunches, 1 set of 10 of crunches on each side and 2 sets of 10 of girly push-ups.  I know it's not all that much but it's better than nothing and it's more than what I have been doing.  Time for some more quality Dave time now that my exercise time and his video game time is up.  Night Night.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Stairs

Today was a day of stairs.  I think between the ups and downs of clients and cleaning and so on I probably climbed about 10 flights of stairs.  I also walked from the bank back to the shop.  So not necessarily a walk but action.  I am not sure why but my left hip is still very painful.  I have yet to isolate which motion hurts more standing up or sitting down because at this point they both hurt.  It doesn't hurt while standing or sitting but the transition is killer.  I may not be walking miles on end but I figure as long as I keep moving my goal to become healthier and lose body fat will be a little more attainable everyday.

Today was pamper mom day and it went kinda ok.  She was running late so she opted out of her ped and chose a quick lunch after her massage instead.  I know we picked a horrible time to try and eat but it seemed every place was absolutely packed!  First Subway, then Mc Ducks and finally BK.  I know none of these places are really healthy but we had a limited time window.  The first two had way too long of a wait and finally BK looked ok as the last ditch effort for food before I had to be back for my next client.

Overall today was very good.  I get to sleep in tomorrow as long as Corbin and Ashley aren't crazy loud trying to be quiet like they usually are in the morning.  If I don't really get to sleep in that will just give me an excuse to get my walk in early.  Silver lining I guess.  ;)  Night Night

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Consistency

This morning I walked to the bottom of the hill and back.  I was originally just going to walk on the treadmill but it was so hot down stairs it was kinda hard to breathe.  It only took me about 30 minutes but it was much more of a workout so I am happy for that.  I was freezing when I got back though.  I wasn't very smart when I left because I only had on a pair of shorts, a t-shirt and a sweater.  Oh well, I was happy to get my walk in none the less.

Although I was bad Thurs and Friday I walked Saturday and twice on Sunday.  So I may not be very consistent yet but I will get there eventually.  I was thinking about getting on the treadmill tonight but my hip joint hurts not just a sore muscle pain so probably not a good idea.  Hopefully tomorrow will be another treadmill night.  The other thing I was thinking about on the walking front was I should start walking during my breaks at work again.  That way if I am tired or sore at the end of the day I will still have gotten my walk in. 

Tomorrow is going to be such a good day!  My mom is coming up for massage and pedicure pampering.  We were doing really well getting her in every month but last month was lost to a change in her schedule that just threw us both for a loop.  Now that all is ironed out again, pampering is back on schedule.  YAY!!!

I think it is time to find a comfortable position in bed and read.  Night Night!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Bad Girl

I was a bad girl and did not walk today.  I didn't have anyone in my book today either so I took the day off.  I know, I know, I can't get anyone if I don't go in but it was worth it.  I got to hang out with Dave all day even though he slept most of it.  I did get my massage cd's ripped which I've been wanting to do, I also updated my massage play list for work and I talked with my cousin Josh who will be going back to Maryland in the morning.  So overall I consider today a very good day.  Tomorow is back to work, walking and even a little volunteer work which isn't so voluntary since Trish volunteered all the girls at work without asking anyone first.  Oh well!  Bed time it is though.  Night Night!  :)

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Staying Accountable

So to follow up on yesterday's post:

I did walk on the treadmill again tonight.  I should probably start having some sort of time telling device near me though.  I say I was on there 30ish minutes but it was heavily interupted watching a 3 year old.  Although, I must have stayed at workout level the whole time because I was definitely sweating and my legs were kind of jelloy while I was stretching afterwards.  Also, when Karen came down, I was stretching and she said it was 8:45 and I had started shortly after 8.  I wish the trackers on her treadmill worked but oh well.  Toy Story will just have to work as my tracker/time telling device for now.  That movie is always the movie Corbin (the 3 year old) wants to watch and since he was with me downstairs, it is what I watched while walking. :)

Today was a good day at the shop.  I had two scheduled appointments and then a walk in made my day.  I love walk-ins!  I don't get many of them which is why I almost jump for joy when one comes my way.
There is no one my book for tomorow so I am going in at 1.  Maybe by the time I get there someone will want to come see me.  Here's hoping.

Also, following up on yesterday's spray tan.  Before my shower, I definitely felt and looked dirty, actually down right filthy, like I enjoyed rolling in dirt all day.  Don't get me wrong I love dirt but I hate looking like a scuz bucket on purpose for 8 hours.  You're supposed to wait 6-8 hours before getting wet in any way, sweat, rain, shower, anything.  I waited 7 hourse before walking and then by the time I took a shower it had been 8 hours.  Everything is all well now.  No more scuzzy Rachel and the pray tan  looks very natural.  That is if becoming 5 shades darker over night is natural.   :)

I think it's time to read and then zonk out.  Sleep has not been nice to me as of late.  Hopefully tonight will net me more than 4 hours.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

New Things

I received my first spray tan today.  As step one to learning to give spray tans I made an appointment with Trish to spray me so I could get the run down on some do's & don'ts.  I also watched her in the mirror so I could see what she was doing without ruining my spray (of course!).  It was definitely very interesting and I am more than positive I will have no problems spraying someone else as soon as I get the spray pattern and tempo down. 

The second new thing was I walked on the treadmill today for almost 30 minutes.  Although I have been on a treadmill before, today is day one of doing it everyday.  I even jogged for a little bit.  I do mean a little bit though, it was one time for less than a minute.  I have been saying I want to lose weight but have never done anything about it.  Recently I went to cheer Jen on in her 1st 5K race.  I am so proud of her for finishing the race with no walk breaks.  I am also thoroughly impressed, inspired and proud of all the weight she has lost doing the couch to 5K program, eating healthy and just being overall amazing.  After seeing everything she has accomplished I have decided what better time than now to start doing what I have been talking about for years.

I am thinking blogging about what I do for exercise everyday will keep me accountable and motivate me to keep up with it.  My only issue, that I just need to get over, is working out when Dave is here.  I know he would do nothing but encourage and possibly even join in but I become extremely self conscious at the thought of him seeing how out of shape I am.  I don't know what my deal is.  He sees me everyday.  He knows I am not in shape by any means but for some reason my brain is just retarded about him seeing me exercise.  I guess the phrase "Suck it up Buttercup!" is going to apply here.

Well I'm off to bed.  I have an early client in the morning.  Not that 10 am is early but when you don't normally start til 12 that 2 hours can make a huge difference.  ;)

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Holiday Goodies Round 2

Today was a fun filled day of holiday goodie making with Mom & Tasha and eventually Jen.  Five batches of patties made, three zucchini cakes with cream cheese frosting, two batches of peanut butter fudge and one batch of chocolate-peanut butter fudge, all made with love over large amounts of laughter.  Dave came down with me as well as Corbin.  Corbin played very well with Suzanne all day.  An amazing feat let me tell you because we have been working very hard to rid him of the potty mouth his mother's now ex-boyfriend instilled upon him.  He played, didn't get lippy with anyone and he didn't say a single cuss word all day.  Progress!!!  Dave went and visited his parents and then his friend Kyle while us girls laughed the day away. 

Some people think it's nuts that we have to break our holiday goodie making into multiple days but we just can't do it all in one day anymore.  I mean if you think about it we make a LOT of delicious, yummy goodies.  There are two more days necessary for goodie making and we have already made 20 dozen peppermint patties, 15 dozen cherry patties, 10 dozen rasberry patties, 5 dozen blueberry patties, 10 lbs of peanut butter fudge, 5 lbs of choc-peanut butter fudge, 5 lbs of no bake cookies, 5 lbs of fruit cocktail cookies and consumed 2 birthday cakes.  The last two days are to prep any more patties for coating, make at least 5 more batches of fudge and finally coat all the patties on the last day.  We used to do all goodies in one weekend which required long days, short nights and not nearly enough laughs.  I think we finally are doing this the right way.  It makes for a very enjoyable tradition no matter how busy our schedules get.

Well I think it's time to curl up in bed.  Although amazingly fun, today has been long and I need to be peppy for work tomorow.  Good night and sweet dreams.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Change?

Lately I have been told, quite frequently mind you, I've changed a lot over the last few months.  I know some mean for the better because apparently I seem happier to some people.  (I am by the way!!)  I am also assuming some mean a change in a not so positive direction.  I am choosing to hold off acknowledging those comments until I see how things play out.  In either case I hope I have changed.  To remain the same is to stop growing, learning, accepting and ultimately becoming a better person. 

Tara F., a person whom I never get to see but hold very near and dear to my heart commented on a post once and these days her comment rings more true than ever.

"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, and forget the ones who don't and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said it would be easy but I promise it will be worth it."

I realize this is someone else's quote but to me it will always be from her and it is remarkably true.  I took the chance, it is definitely changing my life, has been down right torturous and most importantly it, has been so very worth it!

With a little luck, a lot planning and a great deal of self control this coming year will be adjusting and accepting the recent changes in preparation for actively making some very large life changes soon after.  It's time to chill out and get ready for bed.  Good night!

Sunday, November 6, 2011

I just don't know

It's November 6th and the clocks are set back.  I just finished watching a couple movies while walking on the treadmill through the 1st one.  For some reason I want to get in the car and just drive.  I don't know where I just want to go. 

So not that long ago RJ asked me to go to the movies with him.  I hadn't really been avoiding him I just really wasn't thinking about him.  So I was surprised to get anything from him because in the not thinking about him I haven't talked to him.  Well I did respond to his invite, I told him that would be a bad idea since Dave and I started dating not that long ago.  I had never told him earlier because I didn't think it was any of his business.  Well about 2 seconds later he responds with "Wow, that was fast!   *sigh*"  I didn't answer back and I haven't heard from him since.  Dave then came home from work the next morning and informed me that RJ requested to be scheduled so that he would never have to see Dave even for a little bit.  When I first heard this I laughed out loud for quite a long time.  I know that's not right but I thought that kind of reaction was a little overboard.  I guess we'll see what happens soon enough.

Tomorow I have plans to buy a printer, possibly go clothes shopping and then watch Corbin for a few hours.  As much as I love Corbin and want to help Karen, watching him will be interesting since he is just coming back from living with Jeremy again.  Today alone he called his grandma Karen a motherf*cker 3 times!!  Why does Ashley always pick the crappy ones and then move right in with them?  This happened the last time she took Corbin over there for only a couple nights.  I don't know how that guy speaks normally but from the sounds of Corbin's mouth when he gets back I would say Jeremy cusses like a sailing trucker.  Hopefully Ashley gets her head screwed on straight because Corbin doesn't need influences like that ever!

On a positive note, Dave and I have been talking about babies and having two of our own.  He thinks it would be amazing to have twins.  Although there are twins in my family I am more than certain I would rather have one at a time.  We have even talked about names!!  Beverly Anne for a girl and Gabe for a boy.  We still haven't nailed down a full name for a boy.  It's kind of funny to me because when we were with our ex's neither of us wanted children at all but together we are all about having them.  I think he will make an amazing dad.  He is so amazingly good with his nieces and nephew and he is also very patient and wonderful with Corbin.  We aren't in a super hurry but the 1st will happen in the next 2 or 3 years.  I definitely want all child bearing done before I'm 35.  I don't know what is so special about that number but it's the one I picked.

Well I'm off to read I think.  Maybe driving my imagination will satisfy the want to physically drive.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Change of Plans

So not that I ever have much planned but the recents flooding has definitely stirred things up a bit.  While Owego was under water Dave stayed with me at my Aunt Karen's house.  Although I was originally going to use that time to get settled in and become more comfortable being alone in the space I am far from upset that he was here.  I rather enjoyed his company for almost a full week before I took him back to Owego on Monday.  That change of plans was pleasant minus the crazy flood waters and ensuing damage. 

This morning I was going to move some very large tables for Becky and help her set up for a rather large estate/yard sale.  However, rain deterred those plans.  Don't want to the table to get ruined or anything.  Besides nobody really likes working in the rain.  Playing in the rain is a whole nother story!

So far my plans to go out Friday night with Tasha & Dave to see a show at the Haunt in Ithaca are still a go.  I am totally excited to just get out and party with people I know and love.  I haven't heard back from Jen yet but hopefully she can make it too.

One thing that won't change between now and next Tuesday is my birthday on the 20th.  I took that day off only because I plan to party to my hearts content on Monday night as well.  I'm only turning 29 but if I decide to keep that my permanent age then I am going to do it right!

Friday, September 2, 2011

Mobile Test

So this is a test to see if i can blog from my phone. Hopefully it works.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Just Keep Swimming

So this is really the second time writing this post because I some how shut IE down with whatever key combo I pushed.  Woopsie!!  I will also warn you this is very long because I let my fingers type out everything I have been thinking today.

Today has been an extremely rough day for me.  Not physically but more mentally and emotionally.  This morning started out beautifully though, I was able to give Dave the biggest hug when he got home from work.  He has been the most amazing friend, extremely supportive and he always seems to know how to make me smile even when I just want to ball my eyes out.  More times than I care to admit I have almost drown him with my tears.  Dave works nights so after he got some sleep this morning he went over to the trailer with me and helped me load the jeep up twice with stuff for my parents, the truck twice with stuff that just had to go and the jeep again with things that are going up to Karen's with me.  I know it doesn't look like a lot in writing but it was an all day affair none the less.  The moving part was hot and sweaty but not what made my day rough.

RJ stopping in while we were trying to get shit done made things rough.  I know divorces aren't supposed to be easy and I initiated this one so that hardship is all on me.  Because RJ wants to stay together I understand why he's having a hard time with this.  What I don't understand and what is making this rough for me is why after repeatedly telling him I don't want to reconcile, make up or start over again with him he still thinks and acts like we are going to work this out.  Like if he now does the things I have been wanting, asking, nagging and begging him to do for the last 11 years, that will make things alright again.  Or if I could just forgive and forget everything that has been said and done to make me feel like the worst person in the world during our relationship all will be right and we can just go back to being a loving couple.  The sad part is I don't really remember the last time I would consider us a loving couple.  Even during our wedding and honeymoon we annoyed the piss out of each other and I was resentful towards him about certain things.  Maybe that's part of being a "loving couple" but I highly doubt it. 

Sorry I got side tracked, what's particularly rough for me is I do care for him and don't want to see him hurt so I try very hard to be nice about things.  I have told him nicely we are done, I don't want to be with him anymore and that while he's getting his life back together to keep both eyes open to all his options because he might find someone that truly makes him happy.  Then he goes and says that I am that person, he waited 23 years to find me and he can wait a lot longer for me to change my mind and come back to him.  Now I know this is setting himself up to be hurt but I feel like an a**hole because if I weren't being such a selfish bitch trying to make myself happy he wouldn't be in the situation to get hurt more.  On top of conversations like that he goes and tells me all the things he's done to change and be a better person like what I want.  Don't get me wrong the "I've changed" bull doesn't work with me but what gets me is he doesn't understand that I don't want him to be something he THINKS I want.  More than anything I want HIM to be happy with who he is and on many occasions even before the D word came out he has stated that he doesn't like who he's become.

To be perfectly honest I hate the people either of us has become since getting together.  That was one of the things I talked to him about.  When you are with someone you should help make the other person better, naturally without trying.  RJ & I  absolutely did not grow to be better people when we were together.  We became cynical, mean spirited people who covered our resentment for each other and lack of connection with similar tastes in mean humor, sarcasm and snide remarks.  Now when we talked about this he agreed, so why on earth would you want to stay with someone who you resent and in all reality don't like especially when you know you two aren't growing in a positive manor together?  I guess this is also what is rough for me.  I hate knowing that I was part of what made him a worse person than when I met him.  I am not being narcissistic or think it's all on me but part of it is because I definitely didn't help make him a better person.

I am not going to ever run him down or say that this is all his fault because it takes two to tango and I was part of that dance.  A lot of people keep telling me I am not doing anything wrong, I deserve to be happy, I don't deserve to be treated that way, etc.  And for the most part they are right.  I don't deserve to be treated like I was, I do deserve to be happy, leaving may not be wrong but I have done plenty wrong.  I could have stood my ground in college when I tried to break up with him 9 years ago.  I could have been honest with him about not being faithful during any of my college years.  I could have stopped avoiding conflict just to keep him happy.  Instead of yelling at him when he wasn't there I could have just told him to his face all the things that bothered me when they bothered me.  I could have made what I had to say more important or relevant to him so he would listen when I spoke to him.  When he would tell me that because I was his wife, he wasn't supposed to listen to me I should have told him sarcastic or not that kind of comment hurt and made me want to punch his teeth out.  I could have not worked so hard and been home more.  Maybe then he wouldn't have been able to complain about how much of a horrible wife I was because I couldn't take care of him or our house.  Instead of encouraging him to quit a job he hated and find a job he could enjoy I should have left him alone to make his own decision.  He obviously didn't hate it as much as I thought since he needed encouraging to leave it right?  There are plenty of other things I could list out but this is getting longer my the second.

I know I shouldn't worry so much about what other people think about me, how I'm handling all of this or any of that other stuff but I do.  I am petrified I am going to be the crazy woman who ruined this man's life, or the disappointing daughter, niece, granddaughter, sister, etc.  I am also afraid the people I talk to about everything especially Dave are going to just get sick of hearing from me about anything.  I know true friends are there when you need, for as long as you need and will graciously give you a reality check when needed.  I hope I have been that person to all of my friends but I sometimes feel like I am burdening them with more shit than any one person should. 

Dennis and Tesa have been awesome and the drink nights with them have been needed and greatly appreciated.  Becky has let me talk to her about things but I feel horrible because this all happened right when her mom died so she definitely has had other things on her mind.  I actually held off telling her til I knew she needed a good distraction from everything in her life.  Speaking of everything in her life I really need to check in on her.  I miss her and can't wait to talk with her again soon.  Jen would listen and actually wants me to talk to her but she's doing camp stuff and that keeps her very busy in the summer.  She should be home soon so I am sure we will have time to catch up sooner or later.  Karen and I talk and it tends to be very mutual because she is also going through a divorce right now.  She is one of the few people I don't feel bad talking to because she talks to me about her stuff at the same time so it feels like we are both unloading not just a one sided dumping.  And then there is Dave.

Dave you get a whole section all to yourself.  I considered Dave a work friend when we first met because we met at work and did the usual small talk, quick funny humor and shared a very similar work ethic.  When he was going through a rough patch in his life I wanted to reach out and help him but I didn't because he was a work friend and I didn't want to intrude on his personal life.  We also share the work is work and personal is personal and separate mentality.  We never talked about our home lives or hung out outside of work and that's just how it was for a long time.  When life lead him to take a break from everything including work, I tried to keep in touch because I realized I missed him and his company even though it was only work.  While talking to him outside of work we grew to become personal friends.  We weren't telling each other secrets of nothing but we would go to free pool night, hang out and shoot the shit.  Ya know, normal your bored need something to do friend stuff.  Well time changes everything, as always, and we started becoming really good friends.  We made plans to go do things together like going to VA, Ren Fest and coworker birthday parties.  He was actually the first person I talked to about wanting to leave RJ.  I was scared to death to even mention anything truly personal to him and I don't remember what he said or how much I had to drink but everything just kinda spilled out.  Since then I have been talking with him regularly about everything and it seems like we do everything together.  He really has become my BEST FRIEND!  He has been amazing.  Even though I have dumped my pathetic life story and all of its problems on him he has done nothing but be supportive, helpful, encouraging, reassuring and kind.  Even when giving me the reality checks I so desperately need.  He's still protective of parts of his personal life but I totally understand and respect that.  Don't get me wrong, I am curious as hell but I figure when he's comfortable enough he'll talk.  He has with other things so I am sure more will come out.  When it does I hope I can be as good a friend to him as he has been to me. 

For anyone who reads this, whether you know me or not, you may have noticed my affinity for Dave.  We have recently had the what are we and where are we going conversation.  I know I am only recently separated from RJ but everything feels very right with Dave.  We have so much in common it's actually kinda scary for me.  I even told him that sometimes I feel he must be faking some of his likes and dislikes in order for us to possibly have this much in common.  In part of our conversations we have both stated that we don't want to be each other's rebound relationship.  Actually that is one of my biggest fears about relying so much on Dave for my sanity at this point.  What if this goes hay wire?  We have become such good friends that I don't want to ruin that at any cost because I couldn't imagine him not being in my life anymore.  I know not everyone is meant to stay in your life forever but I think he's one that's meant to stay in mine now that he's here.  I feel bad though because after the seeing RJ at the trailor I had one of those I feel like an a**hole breakdown moments.  Dave and I were talking and I said I didn't deserve him and he got kinda frustrated with me.  I know he hates when I beat myself up or say I'm not worth it especially since he says and does so many things that have boosted my confidence but I don't think he realizes how much he does for me that no one else has ever done before.  He's never made me feel less, not worth or unappreciated.  He has helped me move, destress, have a large number of first experiences, regrow my back bone, find what makes me happy again and so so so much more.  I know everyone wishes and hopes to find someone that makes you feel good about being you but I know I have never done anything special enough in the big cosmic, karmik scheme of things to deserve finding that person which is why I don't think I deserve him.  No matter what, I hope I have and continue to show him how much I Love and Appreciate everything about him.  He helps me to just keep swimming.

If you actually read this whole thing I am sorry for taking up your entire afternoon but I feel much better getting all of this out of my head.  It's now 4 am and I am going to bed.  Night Night.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Howin and throwin

Today I plan on being at the trailer all day.  Cleaning, packing any random things that are left, probably demolishing a shed and making the place move in ready for the next owner.  I think I will probably have to make two trips up the road today because I don't have the truck; I only have the jeep.  Although I can pack that thing fuller than hampster cheeks I still might need two trips. 

So one of my time killing past times includes reading a lot of healthy living blogs a) for inspiration and b) for amazingly tasty yet healthy recipes.  This weekend is the Healthy Living Summit being held in Philadelphia.  Of the different healthy living blogs I read, FOUR of the authors are at the summit this weekend and it's rather interesting reading four individual accounts of the same activities.  I know readers can attend the summit and I love attending those type of gathering because you can meet some amazing people, BUT I am still testing the waters on how I can make my life healthier so I don't think I would feel comfortable attending a healthy living gathering especially since I don't live very healthy yet.  Maybe one of these days I will feel like I am on the same level as these other women but until then I'll just keep gathering inspiration and amazing recipes.

On the recipe note, I definitely made an amazing dinner last night.  The main dish was a sauteed mix of cabbage, yellow squash and kielbasa with a bunch of random spices from the cupboard.  Accompanying that was broccoli smothered in creamy melted cheese and desert was these wonderful peanut butter chip rice crispy treats.  Although dinner was delicious and totally filled me up I was absolutely feeling the treats afterwards.

Well time to get my butt in motion or I'll never get anything done.  Hopefully I can get back on here again this weekend before my week carries me away.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Time really does fly!!

Holy Hannah!! It's August and I haven't written anything down since Memorial Day!  Well a lot of things have happened since then.

June:  I put in my 2 week (really 1 month) notice at Price Chopper to persue my massage practice at Nails Plus full time.  This continues to be the best decision I have made in a very long time.  Aaron left for Afganistan the day after Father's Day.  Unfortunately he will be gone for a year but this is supposed to put them in a financial position to do whatever they want with their future.  Rode to Virginia with Tasha and Dave to pick up Aaron's car and dog Aries.  Probably one of the funnest road trips I have been on in years.

July:  The 4th happened calmly with a small fireworks display at Tioga Downs.  The 10th was my last night at Price Chopper!  Thoroughly enjoyed Dennis's birthday party at Greenwood Park.  This also happened to be the month I forged what I think of as a few very strong friendships with some amazing people.  Dave, Dennis and Tesa became well appreciated staples in my life this month.  I went to a party in Syracuse with Dave and met his sister and her family.  That same weekend I told RJ I wanted a divorce in a cowardly yet self preservation driven text message.  Yes I know a text is cowardly but at the time I was in a car on my way to Syracuse and had a very uneasy feeling that conversation would end in physical violence towards me and I didn't want to take that chance.  So I took the cowards way out.

August:  Actually talked to RJ in person about wanting a divorce and my fear of violence having that conversation in person.  Thankfully that meeting and conversation went without incident.  Don't get me wrong there was crying and yelling on both of our parts but no violence.  Yay!  There have been subsequent conversations also smooth going though emotionally charged.  I got my nose and lip pierced.  I am now in the process of moving in with my Aunt Karen who is much closer to Bath where Nails Plus is located.  This coming weekend I will be getting the rest of my things out of the trailor and sheds, cleaning the trailor end to end for the buyer, demolishing a shed and meeting up with Rj on Sunday.  Although I am not interested in reconciling a marriage I am hopeful and optimistic that we can at least try and rebuild a friendship which has been missing for a long time.

Tonight has been spent getting caught up on all things electronic that I have been neglecting given the shear lack of hours in a day.  If and when things begin to calm down again I am hopeful I can start blogging more.  I would llike to start a massage blog.  I know I won't be able to talk about clients specifically but there are many other topics relevent to past, present and future therapists.

Even though the last few months have been very stressful for me they were also filled with some extremely fun events.   The future seems bright and full of opportunities!

Monday, May 30, 2011

Memorial Day!!

Hello Hello!!

Happy Memorial Day to everyone and I hope you have thanked any and all service men and women.

I am contemplating putting in my two week notice at Price Chopper.  I just don't like working there anymore.  Although I know that is not a good reason to quit and I know reliable jobs are hard to come by these days I just am not happy there.  Working day and night is wearing on me pretty hard but my day job just doesn't pay the bills so I know I need Price Chopper still.  I guess I will just keep trying to figure things out.  Something might just come along and be the answer I am looking for. 

I went and raided mom's pantry last night.  I picked up 2 quarts each of string beans, peaches and applesauce, 1 pint each of blueberry and plum jelly and 1 small jar of peanut butter.  Now that gardening and canning season are upon us it's time to get mom's pantry organized for easy loading.  I guess another rationalization I have for wanting to put in my two week notice is I will have more time to help with the garden, fixing things around the house that need to get done, canning, crafting and generally living the way I want to as apposed to just going through the motions to pay the bills.  Wishful thinking I know because the bills always need to be paid and those obligations come first right now.

Hubby is snoozing right now but when he gets up we are going to his momma's house to get some things taken care of that we have been putting off for some time.  His mom wants her air conditioners in, there are trees to clean up that fell down during the storms last weekend and there are two piles of brush that have been waiting since last fall to be burned.  Maybe while he is snoozing I will run down town and get the stuff for my raised beds.  Today could end up being more productive than I thought.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Today is Mother's Day!

Good Afternoon.  I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend and giving special thanks to their moms today!!

The hubby is sleeping and hopefully he stays that way for some time.  Not only has he not been sleeping well, he had an upset tummy last night, making him the most miserable grump ever. :-(  So needless to say I am excited that he is asleep at the moment.  I know I am not a mother of two or four legged children but I think sick hubbies should count.  And on that note I am declaring Happy "Mom" day to me too.

I know I haven't posted anything in over a month and a lot has happened but my brain is having a hard time organizing everything coherently.  I guess I should start with the beginning of April.  Dad's birthday was April 3rd and although we didn't do anything extra special we did have cake and ice cream.  My brother Aaron's birthday was the 4th.  Because he lives in Virginia, we did not get to see him on his day but I did send him a Facebook note and a call to wish him a happy birthday. 

April 9th (I think) I went on a wine tour with a few friends to celebrate Scott's birthday.  It was supposed to be a wine and cheese event around Cayuga Lake.  Even though, as a group, we had a blast and the wine was delicious, we all were disappointed with the lack of variety for the cheese aspect of the event.  After the tour we stopped and had some Thai food in Ithaca but I don't remember the name of the restaurant, sorry.

The Zion Lutheran Gala was the 16th and although I couldn't go I did donate two massage gift certificates to the silent auction.  Hopefully they helped raise some much needed funds.  I never did check in with Jen to see how they made out.  I will have to do that soon.

Easter weekend I went up to my grandpa's house for a huge Easter/Birthday celebration.  April is the month of birthdays in my family.  I think there are 16 total including my Grandpa's which fell on Easter this year!! 

My brother Tim's stepdaughter Heather had her baby on Tuesday the 26th.  His name is Alex and he is super adorable and small.  In a family of large babies (8-11 lbs) he is very tiny at barely 6 lbs.  It's kind of crazy to think of my little brother, who is only 24 years old, as a grandpa especially considering his daughter is only 3.

The 30th mom and I went to the Athens' Craft Fair.  It was fun as always.  This event has grown immensely since we started attending it.  When we first started attending there were the outdoor vendors maybe 4 food vendors and a hand full of booths inside the school.  Now there are the outdoor vendors, about a dozen food vendors, 8 or 10 kiddie rides, the one school building is full of vendors and the second school building is filling in nicely.  I don't know how much more they will be able to grow and still stay at the school.  Either way it is always a fun time.  Mom & I did come to the realization that we don't normally go on Saturday.  We had always gone on Sunday before.  This year we couldn't figure out why it felt extremely busy and packed until we realized it wasn't Sunday. 

After the event we stopped at the Chinese buffet which was delicious.  They always have a huge variety including sushi bar, hibachi grill, standard hot and cold bars, salad bar, dessert bar and a separate fruit bar.  I'm sure I could stay there and eat for hours but I usually keep it simple with three half full plates.  I never fill my plates when eating at a buffet.  First plate is the stuff I want to try but may not like.  Almost like an experiment plate to try things I've never had before.  The second plate depends on how much I actually ate from the first plate.  If I didn't eat much of the experimental plate then I go back for a few things I know I like, sesame chicken, stir fry veggies or lo mien noodles for example.  If I ate most of the experimental plate or am on plate number three it's all about dessert.  I am a creature of habit when it comes to dessert.  I usually get chocolate pudding, bananas with strawberry sauce and possibly some fruit if it looks appealing.

And that brings us back to May and Mother's Day is the first big thing happening for me in May. So I am off to my parent's house.  I think a shower is in order first though.

I should really post more often so my posts are four miles long.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Spuds

 I had completely forgotten there were three potatoes in my produce bowl given to us (a long while ago) by my hubby's mother.  As you can see they have largely developed eyes.  I always thought potato eyes looked  a little alien to me but I digress.

Because I hate to waste anything, especially food.  I cut the eyes off to plant and cooked the rest for RJ's birthday dinner.  Now keep in mind I don't have a garden and had not planned on cooking a birthday dinner.


I originally planned to take RJ out to dinner tonight but he said he just wanted to stay in.  So Plan B turned into warming up the Cajun pork chops my mom sent me home with the other night and the spuds.


I did plant the eyes outside in the compost pile already though.  We"ll see if they actually grow or if the cold will be too much for them.  Today has also shown me that I need to keep more real food in this house.  If we had an unexpected dinner guest right now they would starve.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Exercise?

So I've been thinking lately about how to fit regular, consistent exercise into my hectic inconsistent schedule.  I don't even know where/when to start mapping out my day seeing as I work days and nights.  How about 9am?  That is usually a time of the day I am home. 



9 am = I am usually home getting ready to go to Nails Plus where I love being a Massage Therapist.
10 am - 11:30 am = On the road to Bath, NY ~ 1.25 - 1.5 hour trip.
11:30 am - 8 pm = Clients!  Some days I get out a little early or have a large gap between clients but I am there and awake all day.
8 pm - 9:30 pm = Driving home from Bath, NY.
9:30 pm - 10:30 pm = Either napping or driving to Price Chopper where I am a Grocery Stock Clerk.  If I am scheduled to be there at 10 pm then I am driving to work otherwise I am napping for roughly 45 minutes before I get ready to be to work at 11 pm which is my standard work time.
11 pm - 7:30 am = Standard written work schedule has my shift finished at 7:30 am however in reality I am usually at work until 8:30 am on average.
8:30 am - 9am = drive home

That should cover a typical 24 hours.  You might note there is no scheduled sleep time or meal time.  This is because there aren't enough hours in a day to set aside time for such nonsense.  I don't usually eat anything during the 9 am hour while getting ready for Bath.  I should also mention that getting ready for Bath is more than showering and getting dressed.  It is the time I catch up on Facebook, blogs, and talk to my husband outside of the work environment.  (He works with my at Price Chopper)  I also call Nails Plus to make sure I have clients that day.  Since this hour is pretty packed and precious to me I refuse to add exercise to this hour although I am sure I could add a healthy breakfast.

Usually on the way to Bath I stop at the local KwikFill for a 16 oz fakeccino thing and a cream cheese danish.  I know these are completely unhealthy but I enjoy them and I can consume them while driving.  Time wise this puts me eating something around 10:15 am. 

I will skip my time in Bath for now and come back to it later.  So that takes me to the drive home.  I usually stop at the KwikFill in Bath for a drink and snack for the trip home, however, if I am driving straight from Nails Plus to Price Chopper I will forgo the KwikFill stop and make a fastfood stop along the way.  Usually BK for chicken fries and a small sprite.  Again, not healthy but it's food, sorta.  Time estimate for food is 8:30 pm.

Once at Price Chopper we take scheduled breaks, 30 min lunch at 12:30 am, 15 min break at 3 am and 15 min break at 5 am.  Lunch usually consists of a microwavable something or other (almost always easy mac) and some kind of fruit (apple, banana, etc).  The two breaks do not always include food but most time I do snack on something.  

Now back to Bath.  You must know that I only go to Bath if there is someone scheduled for the day.  I usually have at least one person scheduled everyday.  Also note they are closed on Sundays so I never drive to Bath on Sundays.  Now while there I try to order lunch when the girls do but if I am with a client when they order I just miss out.  Sometimes they will think to order me something but they usually forget.  This would be the perfect place for me to keep fresh fruit/veggies around to munch on between clients but I just don't think of it when I leave Price Chopper or my house.  I usually think of it as I am starving between clients.  For some stupid reason my view on food while there is if I eat great if not oh well.  Not a healthy thought process I know.

So although my 24 hour schedule doesn't have designated time to eat I do have some structured eating time.  As far as scheduled sleep goes that changes on a weekly basis.  At Price Chopper my schedule can change from week to week but my boss knows I work during the day so he tries to keep my schedule steady.  I usually work M, W, F & Sat nights.  So during this standard week I sleep Sun, Tues & Thurs nights for as many hours as humanly possible.  I have had weeks from hell where I worked Price Chopper M, W, R, & F nights and those weeks kill me because those three days in a row means I get 1-2 hours of sleep a day and come Sat night I sleep all night and usually most of Sunday as well.  When I say as much sleep as humanly possible I mean anywhere from 12 - 20 hours.  Twenty hours has been my longest sleep spell since working both jobs.

So although eating and sleeping are not scheduled in the 24 hour plan they do exist even if you have to look at the weekly forecast.  So any thoughts on how to incorporate consistent exercise or should I just fit inconsistent exercise in when I can and be happy with that?  The later will probably win out.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Steel Cut Oats

A few days ago I made a large batch of steel cut oats with dried blueberries, strawberries and cranberries mixed in topped with fresh sliced bananas.  It was absolutely delicious.  The first day I ate about half the batch.  Not all at once mind you but at different times throughout the day.  I finally finished it this morning for breakfast and let me tell you, it warms in the microwave just fine. 

I have been reading a bunch of different blogs lately and it amazes me how many people update their blogs three or four times a day!!  I don't understand a. how they have the time and b. how they keep motivated to be so diligent about it.  I like blogging but i guess i just don't find my life interesting enough to update that often.  Either way they seem very happy in their lives and activities so who am I to question them.

Anywhooo it's time to continue cleaning.  Hope everyone (reading this or otherwise) is having a wonderful day. 

Friday, March 18, 2011

Catching up

Good Morning!!

I literally spent all of At. Patrick's Day catching up on sleep.  Rj & I left work and did our normal payday morning ritual of depositing checks and then going straight to MacDonald's for breakfast.  We do this every Thursday morning after work.  Although McDonald's is probably the worst breakfast we could have it is something I look forward to every week.  We get the same food every time.  The #6.  A sausage, egg and cheese mcgriddle sandwich, hash brown, drink and a hot mustard for me.  Full of saturated fat and cholesterol but absolutely delicious. 

We then drove straight home where I promptly put on pajamas and went straight to bed.  I think I was asleep before I hit the pillow and stayed that way until 12:30 this morning when I woke up to go to the bathroom.  I most certainly needed that 15 hours of uninterrupted sleep after having only 2 hours of sleep/day for the last 4 days.  I was sore and stiff from sleeping so long but after moving around and waking up slowly I feel amazing.

After catching up on sleep I spent 4 hours reading the blogs I like to follow.  I was only two weeks behind on my reading.  Not too shabby if I do say so myself.  I realize these blogs aren't an obligation but I still like to keep up on them.  They are almost like an addiction I think.  Or maybe it's more like watching a soap, a ludicrous past time.

Currently my steel cut oats are cooking on the stove.  They are a new food I thought I would try after several friends stated they were more tasty and healthy when compared to standard rolled oats.  The tastier part will be tested shortly and I'll have to look up the healthier part.

I don't have to be in Bath today so I am most certainly thinking I will be cleaning and sleeping today.  Cleaning because my house is a wreck.  Multiple tornadoes have hit my house, specifically the living room and kitchen.  More sleep will happen later because I have to work tonight at Price Chopper and in Bath tomorrow.

On that note I hope everyone has a fabulous day!

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

NYC Expo

This past weekend I went to the International Esthetics, Cosmetics, Spa Conference down in New York City.  Hands down was the best weekend I have had in a while.  It was at the Javits Center on W. 34th St. in Manhattan.  It was interesting to see all the different products the vendors had to offer.  It was definitely geared more towards the esthetic & cosmetic side but there were a few massage oriented vendors there.  I did get to stop at the Biotone table where I was able to obtain a bunch of different samples.  Almost all the samples I came away with were for products I had wanted to try/experiment with but was too afraid/cheap to spend the money on.  Although on top of the samples I did buy 1/2 gallon of both lotion & oil, a 4 oz tub of body wrap solution and an 8 oz bottle of massage gel which I am excited to try out this week. 

Another table I stopped at had the most comfortable massage tables every.  Unfortunately I don't remember the name off hand but I did get their card and a catalog.  I don't need a new table yet but I am passively looking for a lighter traveling table.  At the conference they had one table displayed that only weighs 21 lbs.  That would fabulous instead of lugging around my table which has a wood frame.  Although none of their tables were particularly wide and I have always favored a wider table.  Probably because I am a larger woman and want my larger clients to also feel comfortable and confident on the table. 

There was a German company I looked at.  They have only been available in the US for a couple years now but the one thing they had that no other vendor there had was a massage candle.  Now I had seen them in catalogs before but had never experienced one.  It was quite pleasant!  I had been nervous to try one because I thought the melted candle would be too hot but because the candle is soy and another oil with no parafin it melts at a much lower temperature.  The end result for the client is the sensation of heated oil and for the therapist is a lubricant with the natural consistency of butter and a heated consistency of oil.  There were none for sale but they did give a small sample candle and I am super excited to try it.

More than likely I will go again next year and depending on how things go this year I may even pay to go the the International Beauty Conference which is in the same building on the same dates. 

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Disoriented & Unorganized

The last few days have left me feeling exactly as the title states.  Our water froze Sunday night.  I don't mean like one or two of the smaller pipes froze, oh no, no, no.  The main pipe coming out of the ground froze.  Not fun.  Rj and I tried all day to get it to thaw out with no results.  Thankfully I had no clients in Bath on Monday and although that is not necessarily bad it is not good because I need income and steady income is even more useful.  We called park maintenance around 5 pm after trying everything we could think of. He came down and said there was nothing he could do; we would just have to wait for it to thaw on its own.  I worked Monday night at Price Chopper which also not bad and actually very routine. 

Return home from work on Tuesday and there is still no water.  I was so frustrated by that and a few other minor incidents (stubbed toe for example) that I basically had a melt down that day.  Because of the melt down I forgot to call Nails Plus to see if I had any clients.  Thankfully I did not but I only know that because Sherri, who is the most fabulous office assistant you could ask for, called me to make sure i was ok because she hadn't heard from me.  In my frustration I couldn't sleep Tuesday and when I finally did fall asleep I woke up later that night to find I had slept through my Zumba class.  I felt terrible and became even more frustrated because I really like it and was looking forward to it.

I finally got back to bed Tuesday night but was up early Wednesday morning.  I woke close to 5:30 am I would guess.  Well doesn't matter, I was trying to get caught up on things before heading to Bath, lost track of time and was late getting to the salon where one of my regulars was my first client.  I felt horrible for being late.  He is such a wonderful person, is never late, never cancels and is such a joy to work with.  He waited almost 30 minutes for me.  Ten of those minutes were because he is always that early but twenty of them were because I was that late!!   I am extremely grateful he is so wonderful and understanding.  After his session I came downstairs to collect my thoughts and possibly get organized only to find out I had three more clients right after him.  I am not complaining about having clients.  That will never happen.  I am very grateful for every client I am priviledged enough to work with but I have to admit I was hoping for a little down time.  So I finish with all my sessions for the day and as I'm walking out the door the owner asks if I would be willing to squeeze in another session before I leave.  I hate to turn down business but I had to.  I knew I had to be to work at Price Chopper that night so I actually turned down a client.  I still feel like kicking myself in the butt but I couldn't help it. 

Anyways, I get home, open the front door and am hit with a double whammy!  I forgot to check the coal in the stove before I left for Bath.  Needless to say the house was filled with the sulfur smell from burned out coal fire and the carbon monoxide detector is going off as well.  I just wanted to turn around and pretend I was at the wrong house and hope nobody saw me.  I did not though.  I opened all the windows and doors, unplugged the stove so it would stop blowing all the sulfur smell through the house, and then pulled the battery from the CO detector.  After about 45 minutes or so I put the battery back in the detector and it didn't continue to sound.  I closed the windows and doors, filled the stove with coal emptied the ash pans and looked for a starter pack to relight the stove.  I couldn't find a starter pack anywhere (I even looked again this mornin and still can't find one).  Needless to say I had to turn the furnace on and won't be able to turn it off until I go get a starter pack from the coal place.

I am now home after another night of work and don't feel quite as frustrated.  Although to add one more thing to my list one of the guys that was suppose to work the load with us last night called out sick.  That means there were only three of us to throw the whole load.  We weren't able to finish it in time but we did finish the majority of the load and all of the leveling.  Not all bad I would say.

I feel much better now.  Time to take a shower and see about heading to bed.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Dream

I had an interesting dream last night.  It was set in FLSM in the massage room.  We were handing around papers which were letters to each student from the school and as classmates we had to sign them kind of like a yearbook.  As I was writing on some of the papers I realized I miss many of my classmates and I especially miss the ones I didn't really get to know all that well.  I find this rather strange.  For example when Avi's paper came around all I could think of was how amazing it was to watch him work.  He made the work look almost spiritual most of the time.  I also thought about Ashley, Alyssa and Danielle.  As much as I was agitated by their actions during the science classes I miss their bubbly attitudes and humorous antics.  Tonight's dream was very enlightening for me and hopefully one day I will be able to rectify the fact that I didn't take the time or effort to befriend more of the wonderful people I went to school with. As I told all of them during one of the closing activities the end of school this is only goodbye for now and I will see them all again, at least once more in their life time.  I do plan on making that happen.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Zumba

I went to my second Zumba class a couple days ago.  I do enjoy it quite a bit.  Although I am highly uncoordinated I seem to do well if I treat it as an aerobics class rather than dance.  For some reason my brain can comprehend that a little easier.  The classes are Tuesday night from 5:30-6:30 pm at the Family Fitness Center in Nichols, NY.  I wish I could afford to attend the Pilate's class offered there as well but between no money and conflicting schedules I am unable to attend.  Maybe in the future things will work out differently. 

On a random note, I was on my way to Bath the other day and felt a sudden wave of disheartedness and mild depression.  That was followed immediately by thoughts of my friend Burton.  I never did contact him that day to see how he was doing but I haven't had a rush of feelings like that since.  Maybe I can get a hold of him this weekend since there is no school on weekends. 

Since I now have an appointment scheduled in Bath tomorrow I should head to bed soon.  Good night.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

So Far

It has been 2011 for more than 2 weeks now and I am finally getting onto this thing.  Not a good start to wanting to blog more regularly.  Baby steps though right? 

Anyways, I haven't done a whole lot yet.  At Nail Plus I did open up my available appointment dates from M, W, F to Mon-Fri.  This week I will be talking to Trish about changing the old estititions room into a waxing/body wrap room.  That will take the waxing of the cubby hole it is in and also give me a place to start doing body wraps when that day comes.  If things go well I may have the body wrap supplies in approx. 1 month. 

I also had a chance to stay with my friend Becky Thurs night.  She was a wonderful and gracious host as always but I was a less than stellar guest.  I was so tired as soon as I laid down on her couch to relax I fell asleep.  This was at like 10 minutes after I got there.  I felt so terrible because I slept for like 12 hours.  Thankfully she understood that I hadn't slept since Tuesday night because of my work schedule.  Hopefully I will have a chance to get up that way again soon and actually stay awake long enough to play some euchre, Yahtzee and any other game we decide to play.

My Price Chopper work schedule as of late has been M, W, F & Sat nights.  My Bath schedule although appointments are available everyday I am still getting booked mostly M, W & F.  Combine these two schedules and I sleep every other night Sun, Tues, Thurs & Sat day.  I am hoping my Bath clientele continues to grow as it has been so that I can do it full time and possibly cut back or stop Price Chopper all together.

Well I am off.  The earliest I will be back is Tuesday.  We'll see if I am still awake enough to post anything.